Fear of Dating

Articles > Fear of Dating

Dating can be scary...for some it represents uncharted waters requiring you to put yourself on the line and risk being exposed. The prospect of dating becomes even more daunting when your friends all appear to be in stable relationships and you find yourself single after many years of coupling. Even if you are miserable for the most part in a relationship, there is still a sense of security in routine (having someone to come home to and share space).

How can you move forward and move past the fear of dating? The only answer is to engage in self-care, build your sense of self and then just get out there! When you engage in self-care you will begin to feel more confident. Chances are that it may take time before you meet the right person--you must accept that as part of your journey. The way to conquer the fear is to build yourself up as much as possible, so that you enter the dating world, aware of potential for rejection, but confident in your self-worth.

Building Self-Confidence to Combat Fears of Dating:
In order to conquer the fear of dating, which is truly a fear of rejection, it is important to work on your self-confidence. If you exude self confidence, you will give to yourself what you need from others.

Here are a few steps needed to conquer the fear of dating, by replacing it with self-confidence:

Focus on your blessings, not your troubles - have gratitude for all of the positive aspects of your life. You may want to create a list of all of the beneficial aspects of who you are, what you have to give and the wonderful aspects of your life.

Don't be afraid to speak up and state your opinions - people respect intelligence and intelligence is exhibited by offering your views on topics without lecturing.

Exercise and eat well - how you treat your body is a reflection of how you feel about yourself.

Be positive -if you are constantly saying to yourself "I am unworthy of love," you will create that reality. If you change your internal script and say "I am a catch." You will find that you will be what you create.

Be realistic - remember that nobody is perfect. Examine the faults that you would like to change and work towards them.

Look your best and have good posture - make sure that you take care of yourself and dress well. If you feel that you are dressed sharply and well taken care of physically it will help you exude confidence.

Smile and laugh often- most importantly do it for the sense of joy in yourself, it may also prove to be infectious.

Shoshana Dayan
Vancouver Family Therapist
therapyrenewal.com